Sunday, 14 July 2013

What if all along you've been good to them?

Normally after you've reverted to Islam, inshaAllah psychologically your parents would accept you well when you could prove to them that you're a better person after reverting. From terrible to better 

But what if all along you've been good to them? In other words, there's no contrast for you to let them see the difference.

And in worst case, instead of loving you like before, they scold you, nag you for reasons like the hassle of going for Halal food. You want to shower your love to them, but you're hindered by their bitterness. As a result, you might be raising your voice out of reaction. You cannot even put a smile after realizing you've been cheated into eating what you thought as chicken, but actually contain pork. 

How to be better person, better than before-reversion, when you're so badly treated like an enemy in the family?

Perhaps, perhaps I've come to an understanding that, when you're being scolded, your only way is to bite your lips, and put a struggle not to raise voice. That way, you won't be making things worst. That way too, you won't be labeled as "becoming worst than before-reversion" even though they're scolding you for petty mistakes. "Mistakes" such as refusing to eat a vegetable that has been dipped into pork (that action has been labeled as "extremism" weirdly).

All in all, don't let your frustration become a target of their excuse. Continue to show your kindness in other ways, such as when your mom told you to wash dishes, even if you've been unfairly called to do this 100 times while your siblings aren't doing anything. Consider this as serving Allah. Trust me, inshaAllah you will feel less frustrated.

And when you keep your focus on serving Allah, inshaAllah Allah will help turn the situation. Alhamduliah, my mom now instructs my younger brother to wash dishes. Fair, Allah is Fair.

Perhaps there're better ways and surely Allah is Most Wise. May Allah grant us better understanding and may He open our beloved family members' hearts to Islam...

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