Friday, 24 April 2015


A dynamo does not have electricity.
Instead, it generates electricity.
You don't have happiness.
Instead, you generate happiness, inshaAllah.

When your handphone runs out of power,
you plug it to be recharged.
What are you waiting for,
when you feel very down?

~ inspired & adapted from Brendon Buchard's motivation talk

Karena Cinta PadaMu

Kerana cinta kepada Allah,
hamba rela keluar
daripada bertanding
cinta tiga segi ini.

Tidak akan ku biarkan,
hati yang dibentuk Pencipta
mensia-siakan masa,
mengejar yang satu.

Karena hanya yang Satu,
Maha Mengetahui
siapakah yang terbaik
bersama sebagai pasangan.

Karena jalan di Dunia ini,
penuh duri tajam.
Siapakah yang mampu
teguh bersama
bergading hati
ke Jannah?


~ nukilan diilhamkan daripada rakan seperjuangan.
21.4.2015 6:48pm

Tuesday, 14 April 2015

Lead Them, Or Be Led Away

Initially I was hesitant to talk about my thoughts about grandma's funeral to elderly friends, because I feel it might be something uncomfortable for them.

However, when I was strolling around the graveyard, I notice some deceased are as old as my parents. Seeing these sent shivers down my heart.

It was at this point that I came to realize the fact that, alhamduliah my parents are still well and alive, despite disagreements between me and them.

Life indeed is not only short. It's unpredictable too. We might have lots of disagreements with parents, but never let that overwhelmed the need to spend time with them.

Strive to hold their hands even though they might walk away from you, because we won't know when they will be led away by angel of death...

- 12 April 2015, 15:10PM

The Test in Love

I remember usthada Yasmin Mogahed said in her book Reclaim Your Heart, something like this line:
"The person whom you love most,
eventually become your biggest test."
With my dear grandma passed away yesterday, the whole funeral is shrouded with countless rituals.
Eventually I have to keep distancing myself from the funeral parlour each time a particular ritual begins, which is also to prevent discomfort among relatives from my refusal to participate.

Sitting at the backlane corner of the building, I can only flip through the photos of grandma in my handphone, while the rest of family gathers near her coffin.

- 11 April 2015, 21:21PM

Wednesday, 8 April 2015

Stucked Speech & Awakening Awareness

Having gone through a depression-kind of setback, I discovered how greatly it has impacted on my speech.
Going through the gloomy moments made me think a lot of things in mind. Then, there's being disappointed by friends whom I expected to be offered a listening ear and good advises.

In the end, all these had driven me into silence. I thought keeping my mouth shut would be better in enduring the pain patiently, waiting for the heavy rain to stop soon.
However when the sun is rising, I found myself struggling to open up. This is made obvious when I attended an interview. I notice I had a hard time expressing my thoughts. Furthermore, having recently come out from the cocoon, I was still in a daze with no clear plans on how I would like to drive my future. I was terribly stuck at that point.
Nevertheless, I'm thankful that Allah has pointed out the shortcomings that I need to improve.
Whether I will be accepted or not is one thing, but whatever the outcome, I pray that Allah strengthen my heart with Sakinah & to be more concerned in pleasing Him than anyone else.
Alhamduliah, unexpectedly yesterday I had a meaningful discussion with my friend on Tawakkul. Here, I still had difficulty expressing my points in thoughts, but the fruits produced in this 'usrah' style discussion had greatly encouraged me to keep pushing forward and break the barrier wall in my mind.
Alhamduliah the discussion proved to have open the next road to me in getting closer to Allah, especially the conviction to complaint to Him when falling into setback, because previously as someone from freethinker background I always feel like talking to the wall whenever I try to cry to Allah. Jazakumullah khairan Ali Muhammad Sabri & Ng Kuan Beng for your time and sharing

Saturday, 4 April 2015

A Cold House

I do not need anyone to come and assist.
I just need words of encouragement,
in order to keep marching forward,
during the hardest decision moment.

I know I'm not strong enough yet.
But I don't care how painful this world is,
so long as I know there's someone
who will always support my decision,
even if the whole world is against me.

I know Allah is enough for us,
but please show me how.
why then He cares to sent Prophet?

Prophet faced the hardest trial in life,
yet he never failed to comfort believers'
wounded hearts.
No matter how small it is.

What wrong have I done?
Please let me know.

In the tears brimming
at the edge of my eyes,
I wonder why the motivation comfort
comes from someone outside,
instead of someone who invited me to his house.

How then will his house be my spiritual sanctuary too,
if the owner himself is cold?